101 Things
by TheSupernova
Summary: ...That the Master of the Jade Palace must never do again, ever, and the punishments they recieved. Some mild romance, Ti/Po and Vi/Cr. Rated for slight language and references. Now taking requests for oneshots from the list.
1. The List

**Ciao everybody! So, I should be updating Reign of the Fang (I promise, I'm working on it!) but I was inspired to write this by many stories I read around the site, three I think that are particularly worthy of mention are 'A Tiger Master's Code' by corset-rebellion-follower, '101 things Tai Lung May Not Do' by FalconMage and 'Palace Troubles' by FFcrazy15. I'm warning you all right now this isn't supposed to be serious, like a lot of them you can imagine actually happening but a lot are OOC. So, without any more babbling from me, I present you…**

**101 Things that the Masters of the Jade Palace must never do again, ever, and the punishment they received for said thing.**

**Number. Master-Thing they must never do again, ever : punishment**

1. Po-Stole Monkey's almond cookies from Monkey's increasingly inventive hiding places, and when caught claimed he was 'training' : Bought Monkey twice as many cookies as he ate.

2. Viper-Put makeup on Mantis and Monkey while they were sleeping, told them they had been turned into girls by the gods and subsequently sent them to the Mongolian mountains for a non-existent flower that would change them back, and then tell Master Shifu that they each eloped with their secret girlfriends: Ran the obstacle course 20 times in a row, was banned from Po's noodle soup for a month after Monkey and Mantis returned and cleaned the entire Jade Palace.

3. Mantis-Paralysed Viper with acupuncture needles as payback for sending him and monkey on a wild goose chase: Gave Viper acupuncture every day for a week after training.

4. Monkey-Hid almond cookies at various points of the obstacle course and watched Po try to get to them : Rebuilt the obstacle course and shared his remaining cookies with the others.

5. Tigress-Tricked Zeng into delivering Master Shifu fake messages from his 'secret admirer' : Was never caught.

6. Po-Pretended to be the spirit of Master Oogway to scare the Five : Sparred with each of the Five the next day.

7. Crane-Hid a love poem from Po in Tigress' room : Was chased by furious tiger and panda through the ironwood forest.

8. Monkey-Ran through the village in the middle of the night singing at the top of his lungs in falsetto on a dare: Publicly apologized to the village, and was subsequently made to apologize to each household in person. Also had his almond cookies taken for three days.

9. All inhabitants of the Jade Palace-Played truth or dare while Shifu was sleeping: Were each forced to fix the mess they made and ran the obstacle course five times, with the exception of Po who fought the adversary.

10. Mantis-Used acupuncture needles to lock Shifu's face in a comical expression-See number 11.

11. Shifu-Threw Mantis' acupuncture needles into the pool of Sacred Tears and force him to dive for them : No punishment

12. Tigress and Viper-Stole the boy's clothes from the bathing house and hung them from the roof of the Jade Palace : Bought new clothes for Mantis, Monkey, Crane and Po, and sparred two against four with them.

13. Po-Attempted to find out if he could tie Tigress' tail in a knot while she was sleeping : Thrown onto the obstacle course by an enraged Tigress.

14. Crane-Painted black spots on everybody while they were sleeping, and claimed they'd contracted a rare, highly contagious illness to get out of training : Got the Palace quarantined for a week, sparred with Shifu and walked to the Pool of Sacred Tears every day for three weeks to reflect on his actions.

15. Viper- Stole Crane's calligraphy set whilst under quarantine : Praised by Shifu and fellow warriors, barring Crane.

16. Monkey- Stole Viper's lipstick and put it on Crane while he was sleeping to convince Shifu they were dating behind his back : Bought new makeup for Viper, apologized to a blushing bird and snake and was put on dishwashing duty for two days.

17. Tigress- Woke Po up in the middle of the night and claimed the sun didn't rise when is should have and the Gods were angry, resulting in Po running through the Jade Palace, ironwood forest and village screaming about the oncoming apocalypse : Banned from Po's cooking for a month, sparred with Shifu for a week and publicly apologized to the entire valley.

18. Mantis-Hid in the obstacle course tripping everybody up, and claimed he was practicing his stealth abilities because of his awe at Po's 'stealth mode' : Locked in a cupboard by an angry Tigress.

19. Po- Used his 'stealth mode' to sneak into Shifu's room and steal his flute on a dare : Attacked by a very annoyed Shifu.

20. Monkey- Tried to cook his own almond cookies because he can't be bothered walking down to the village : Rebuilt the kitchen after the fire.

21. Tigress- Pushed Po down the palace stairs while she was in a 'mood' : Carried the injured panda up said stairs and acted as his nurse while he healed.

22. Shifu-Sent the Five and Po on an invented mission to a far off city when they were irritating him : Received a fake letter from the Five claiming they were in mortal danger and needed his assistance.

23. Viper and Tigress-Asked Shifu for a day off to meditate in the Dragon Grotto, then spent the day shopping in the valley : Had to meditate for three days uninterrupted after being caught sneaking their spoils back into the palace.

24. Crane-Wrote 'CRANE IS YOUR GOD' on every available surface : Cleaned the entire palace and was appointed janitor for three months.

25. Monkey and Po-Trapped Mantis in the trunk of an ironwood tree after he stole both of their secret stashes of food : Rescued Mantis two days later when they realised he was still trapped.

26. Monkey and Po-'Borrowed' Shifu's staff to aid the rescue of Mantis after he got himself even more stuck : Wacked over the head with said staff several times and made to punch the ironwood trees every day for a week.

27. Mantis-Bound and gagged Monkey and Po before rolling them down the stairs of the Jade Palace as revenge for 25 : Received no punishment.

28. Tigress-Handed out water from the Pool of Sacred tears, claiming it was 'Concentrated Inner Peace' : Tracked down each bottle she gave out.

-Paintd pictures of Monkey, Mantis and Po wearing dresses and put them up around the village : Found himself added to each of the pictures the next day.

30. Po and Tigress-Stayed up late eating from the Peach tree of Heavenly Wisdom the day before a mission : Forced to keep up with the others in fear of Shifu's staff the next day

31. Po- Almost used the Wuxi Finger Hold on Shifu while sleepwalking : Beaten awake by Shifu with the first thing that came in handy, which happened to be his flute

32. Shifu-Went all out while sparring with Po because of his broken flute : Carried Po to the medical wing

33. Monkey- Glued fake wings to Viper's back and told her she was actually a very rare giant caterpillar, and she had just transformed into a butterfly : Removed the incredibly stubborn wings and acted as Viper's servant while she was confined to her bed after receiving wing removal related injuries.

34. Viper-Stuck almonds in Monkey's fur and warned him that "You are what you eat" : Received no punishment due to previously mentioned wing injuries.

35. Mantis-Sold Jade Palace 'keepsakes' consisting of the other's things i.e Viper's flowers, Crane's calligraphy set and Mantis' acupuncture needles : Tracked down the things and bought them back for twice what he sold them with his own money

36. Po-Abused his knowledge of Shifu's allergies to avoid sparring with him : Payed medical expenses and sparred with Shifu for two weeks.

37. Po-Abused his knowledge of _everybody's _allergies : Same as 36, plus was chased through the Palace by sick warriors

38. Monkey, Crane and Mantis-Made shadow puppets on Po's walls at night to scare him : Tracked down the hectic panda and slapped him until he was making sense.

39. Po-Chased Monkey, Crane and Mantis for slapping him one too many times : No punishment

40. Crane and Viper-Left a note saying they'd eloped and watch from a distance as Shifu freaks out : Confessed their 'love' for each other in front of the entire village

41. Crane and Viper-Confessed their love for each other while Shifu happened to be walking to the bathhouse : Lectured by Shifu about appropriate times and places.

42. Tigress-Shattered Po's innocence by 'accidentally' leaving an extremely inappropriate, illustrated book outside his room : Was made by Shifu to give Po 'the talk'.

43. Crane-Posted an ad for a room to rent at the Jade Palace, and placed signs pointing to Shifu's room : Rented his room out for a week to an extremely lazy pig named Kevin.

44. Monkey and Crane-Put up signs around the valley revealing everybody's secrets on a dare from Mantis : all three were made to reveal their own secrets via signs.

45. Shifu-Lured his students into a 20ft hole as part of a 'training exercise' : Received no noodle soup for two weeks and was locked in his room when they escaped.

46. Mantis-Stole pages of Viper's diary that talked about Crane and dance around reading them in a sing-song voice : Beaten to a pulp by a very angry snake and bird.

47. Viper-Sent Tigress gifts from Po and vice versa in an attempt to set them up : See 52.

48. Tigress-Ran off for three days after receiving professions of love from 'Po' : Hit with Shifu's staff twice.

49. Po- Confessed his love for Tigress in his sleep : Was lectured by Shifu about courting his daughter, then wished luck by same red panda.

50. Tigress- Confessed her love for Po while he was at the top of the Jade Palace Stairs : Carried him to the medical wing and was appointed his nurse.

51. Tigress and Po-Made out in the medical wing : Forced to explain in front of everyone, scolded by Shifu about 'straining Po's injuries' and teased for about one second before Tigress glared.

52. Tigress and Po-Tied Viper in a knot around an ironwood tree after finding out about 52 : Apologized to said snake and untied her.

53. Mantis-Hid the morning gong so the palace workers had to run around looking for it and everybody could sleep in : Woke up early to ring the gong for two weeks.

54. Po-Cooked horrible food and said it will enhance the other's Kung Fu : Had to eat the entire pot of aforementioned food.

55. Monkey- Greased the obstacle course so everybody slipped : Ran the greased course until he did it perfectly.

56. Tigress-Taught herself to cry on demand then burst into tears when she was asked to spar : Crane later put up posters of a crying Tigress that read 'Tiger or Kitten?' in the village.

57. Mantis and Monkey-Announced a one day event called 'Pet the Kitty' : Were dressed up by Tigress as baby tigers and forced to walk around the village.

58. Viper and Mantis-Painted on the other Jade Palace residents during the night and said their tattoo artist got a little carried away : Each had to get a small tattoo of their own.

59. Tigress and Po-Made out heatedly where they knew Shifu would see : Lectured about controlling themselves, whacked with Shifu's staff.

60. Mantis and Monkey-Entered Tigress in a beauty pageant : Let's just say they were sore for a _very _long time.

61. Crane-Painted funny faces of all the sleeping residents of the palace on a dare from Monkey : Went around for a week with the same faces painted on himself.

62. Monkey-Cut patches in Po's fur and convinced him he was moulting : Had his tail shaved.

63. Viper and Tigress-Pretended to be pregnant to see Shifu's reaction : Sent on an unimportant mission to the other side of China.

64. Po-Randomly fell over in a public area and stopped moving, except for an occasional twitch in his leg for no reason : Endured hours of medical checks.

65. Mantis-Screamed like a girl outside Shifu's room on a dare : Was faced with a very angry red panda and his staff.

66. Viper and Tigress-Glared/growled/hissed at Mantis and Monkey during dinner just to make them scared for their lives : No punishment.

67. Crane- Painted vases like those from the Hall of Sacred Warriors and put them outside Po's room so he knocked them over in the morning : Received no noodle soup for three days.

68. Viper-Snuck Crane noodle soup after the vase incident : Did meditation on top of training every day for a week.

69. Tigress-Made loud noises in the middle of the night to make everybody feel uncomfortable, then asked them why they were all avoiding her gaze the next day : See 70.

70. Po-Asked if Tigress could 'explain' the previous night : No punishment.

71. Shifu-Took a vow of silence when his students were ignoring him : Was followed by a hired mime for two weeks.

72. Monkey-Made a trail of peaches from Po's room to a random part of the ironwood forest so Po would get lost while sleepwalking : Searched for the Dragon Warrior for two days, found him living off the peaches as a hermit.

73. Mantis and Crane-Replaced Tigress' clothes with 'specially made' ones, so it looked as though she was walking around naked : Faced the wrath of the tiger and washed her clothes for a month.

74. Mantis-Hid in Crane's hat so he wouldn't have to train : Injured when the hat fell while Crane was swooping.

75. Tigress-Claimed she found a secret library near the Pool of Sacred Tears that had another thousand scrolls of Kung Fu, then proceeded to 'forget' where it was and say "It's around here somewhere, I know it is." for the next few hours : Pushed into the Pool of Sacred Tears by annoyed warriors, forced to execute each Kung Fu pose she knew until she did it perfectly and run the obstacle course 25 times.

76. Shifu-Stood on top of the Jade Palace saying "Master, is that you?" and walking dangerously close to the edge because he was bored : Fell off the Jade Palace and was visited by an amused turtle spirit in his dreams.

77. Viper-Tied up Mantis with her ribbons because he wasn't paying attention while he was doing acupuncture on her : Had to buy new ribbons after her old ones were shredded.

78. Monkey-Scattered almonds around the floor of the bunkhouse proclaiming himself the 'Cookie King' and tried to eat the paper walls whilst sleepwalking : Cleaned and repaired the bunkhouse, endured comments from the others.

79. Tigress-Put black dye in the bathhouse water and white dye on the towels so everybody looks like a panda, therefore Po won't be the last of his kind : Chased by several angry 'pandas' through the Valley of Peace, much to the confusion of the villagers.

80. Viper-Stuck fake fangs in her mouth and slept in a coffin to convince Po she was a rare Vampire Snake on a dare : Was almost staked by a freaked out panda.

81. Po- Faked a letter from his real dad so he could go on an epic adventure : Got lost and wandered around China for two weeks before being found.

82. Mantis-Brought multiple girlfriends to the palace at once after drinking just a _little _too much : The hangover and bitch slaps were punishment enough.

83. Viper-Hired geese to carry her through the village and proclaimed she was the princess of a far off land : Received another lecture from Shifu, this time about dignity and the proper behaviour of a Kung Fu master.

84. Crane-Recorded everything Po said in his sleep and posted it on signs around the village : Tied to the obstacle course after Po woke up to find Crane in his room.

85. Mantis, Monkey, Crane and Po-Had a drinking contest during the winter festival : Found pictures of their drunken antics posted around the village and palace.

86. Tigress-Left Viper messages from Crane, detailing very specifically what he wanted to do to her that night : Was rewarded with a long, sleepless night.

87. Monkey-Stole everybody's bed mats, leaving behind messages saying 'Your property will be used to fuel the Emperor's fire in the winter months.' : Slept on the ground for a week.

88. Viper-Hid Po's cooking utensils, moved all the food in the cupboards around and mixed up the labels on the spices : Ate a terrible meal and was banned from Po's cooking for two weeks by furious masters.

89. Mantis and Monkey-Moved an assortment of exotic plants into the barracks in the middle of the night and claimed the jungle was overtaking the world : Injured by an overzealous Po, lectured by Shifu and whacked with his staff, removed all the plants, cleaned the entire palace and ran the obstacle course twice each.

90. Crane-Threw blue paint on the palace roof, saying he was tired of it being the 'Jade' Palace, and now it could be the Sapphire Palace : Repainted the roof the proper colour and was forced to offer his roof painting services to the rest of the valley.

91. Po-Labelled a spice container 'Secret Ingredient' and filled it with chilli powder, then left it on the kitchen table : Received no punishment.

92. Mantis-Used his acupuncture needles to freeze everybody's faces then claimed the wind had changed : Was chased by furious masters and tied to the Peach tree of Heavenly Wisdom.

93. Monkey-Balanced buckets of water on the doors of the training hall : was forced to open the door himself when Shifu figured it out.

94. Viper-Didn't hold back on Po during a spar when she was moulting : Chased the concussed (and unusually fast) panda around the palace while he yodelled at the top of his lungs.

95. Tigress-Wore a pink dress to confuse everybody : Received no punishment.

96. Tigress, Po, Viper and Crane-Caught on a double date in the village while they were supposed to be on patrol : Forced to make public shows of affection, loudly proclaim their love for each other and be generally romantic towards each other, much to their embarrassment.

97. Shifu-Sent Zeng on a wild goose chase to find his long lost uncle and deliver him a message : Received no punishment.

98. Mantis-Set up a treasure hunt around the palace by stealing everybody's things : No noodle soup for a week, sparred with Shifu, slapped by Viper and ignored for two days.

99. Crane-Stuck glasses on Po while he was sleeping and convinced him he was going blind : Received no punishment other than helping Po remove the glasses.

100. Viper-Danced with her ribbons on the roof of the Jade Palace : Endured a two hour lecture on respect for Sacred places from Master Shifu.

101. Mr Ping-Set up a noodle and tofu shop in the Palace courtyard, cooking food on the Fields of Fiery Death on the obstacle course and employing the palace geese as his helpers for a much better wage than they would normally be payed : Received no punishment.

**And there you have it, 101 things the inhabitants of the Jade Palace must never do again, ever. I am quite happy to write one shots of these, and if anybody has a specific one they'd like me to write about I'd be more than happy to oblige. **

**But for now, Ciao!**


	2. Number 60-Beauty Pageant

**Shoutout to WFeathers. This chapter is dedicated to you!**

**60. Mantis and Monkey-Entered Tigress in a beauty pageant : Let's just say they were sore for a **_**very **_**long time**.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Monkey asked

"Trust me, it's a brilliant plan." Mantis said from his perch on Monkey's shoulder

The Valley of Peace was silent under cover of night, save for the sound of two Kung Fu masters walking through the village streets.

"She's going to kill us." Monkey said, looking at Mantis from the corner of his eye

"It's still worth it." Mantis insisted

"I actually value my life." Monkey grumbled, but didn't say anything else

It was the dead of night, though the summer air prevented the night from being too cold. But the next day, the Valley of Peace was holding an event for animals from all over China. And the second Mantis had heard about it he'd run off dragging Monkey along with him.

The village was silent as the two walked through, and Monkey couldn't help but look over his shoulder every couple of minutes.

"Relax man, she's not here." Mantis said

"Do you have a death wish or something?" Monkey asked

"What's the worst she can do to us?" Mantis replied

"Do you really want to think about that?" Monkey argued back

"Whatever. Help me find the right house."

The two didn't speak as they searched for the right house, save for the occasional argument about directions. For warriors that protected the Valley of Peace, the two didn't know their way around the streets very well.

"This is it." Monkey said, stopped in front of a doorway

It was an impressive house by the village's standards. Two storeys, a lot of windows and a small well-kept garden in front. Near the outskirts of the village too, it obviously belonged to a well off family. And they were in charge of organising village events and festivals.

"Do you have it?" Monkey asked, looking to Mantis

"Yeah, right here." Mantis said, jumping from Monkey's shoulder, holding a rolled up piece of paper. He slid it under the door, then retook his former place.

"We are so dead." Monkey said one last time before they headed back

_**The Next Day**_

Tigress sighed, rolling over in her bed. She was tired. Fresh back from a mission with Viper, Shifu had given them both a day off from training. It was only an hour since the morning gong. Far too early to be awake.

She closed her eyes, about to settle back into sleep, when she heard something. She snapped her head up, silently scrambling to sit up. She heard it again, the distinct sound of footsteps. It wasn't any of the palace workers, Tigress knew what geese sounded like when they walked through the Jade Palace.

Once her initial shock wore off, Tigress smiled to herself. Whoever was in the barracks wasn't doing a very good job at remaining undetected.

Tigress stood up, making sure she made as little sound as possible as she walked to the door. She raised her hand to open it, just slightly, but was beaten to it when the door was flung open by a very overzealous looking sheep.

"Master Tigress?" The sheep asked, though it was clear she knew who Tigress was

"Yes?" Tigress asked

"I'm here to help you get ready for the beauty pageant." The sheep said, oblivious to the look of shock that passed over Tigress' face

"Th-the what?" Tigress spluttered

"Beauty pageant. See, I have your entry form right here." The sheep said, holding out a piece of paper

Tigress took the form and unrolled it, instantly recognising Monkey and Mantis' handwriting. Her name was in the participant section of the form, and just a little further down Tigress saw the names 'Monkey' and 'Mantis' scrawled in the nominator section.

Tigress knew she had a few options. One, she could go along with it and enter the beauty pageant-not likely. Two, she could send the sheep away and go back to bed, leaving Monkey and Mantis for later. That option seemed a little better, but Tigress knew there was one other thing she could do.

"Oh, I'm so sorry. I seem to have not filled this form in properly." Tigress said, putting on her most innocent voice. She didn't want the sheep to hear the sadistic amusement she was taking in the situation

"What do you mean?" The sheep said, cocking her head

"I was nominating Mantis and Monkey for the contest. I must mixed up where I put our names." Tigress said, biting her lip for effect

"Masters Monkey and Mantis?" The sheep said, looking at her confusedly

"They asked me to enter them. I think it was on a dare." Tigress said, making up a believable story

"Well, where might I find them?" The sheep asked

"The training hall." Tigress replied

"I'm so sorry to have bothered you." The sheep said, bowing

"It's no problem." Tigress said, closing the door and returning to her bed

_**That Evening**_

Monkey and Mantis-after what seemed like the worst day of their lives-were finally back at the Jade Palace. Arguing had done them no good when the over confident sheep had rushed them out of the palace, down to the village.

And now, after an entire day of enduring endless hours of what seemed like torture to them, the two had another task-avoid Tigress.

They knew they really had it coming to them the next day in training, but they were both eager to put that off for as long as possible.

They were almost at the barracks, were they would be safe until morning, it was just a few steps away. Suddenly, the two became aware of the sound of somebody following them. They both froze, praying to whatever gods would listen that it wasn't Tigress.

"Hello boys."

So much for the gods.

**Ok guys, I'm taking requests for one shots, yeah? Next chapter is 79.**


	3. Number 79-Fake Pandas

**Wolfgangwalker12, this is your chapter!**

**79. Tigress-Put black dye in the bathhouse water and white dye on the towels so everybody looks like a panda, therefore Po won't be the last of his kind : Chased by several angry 'pandas' through the Valley of Peace, much to the confusion of the villagers.**

Po sighed, slumped against the Peach Tree of Heavenly wisdom. It had been two days since their return from Gongmen City, and Po was still trying to process everything that'd happened.

"Po?"

The panda turned around to find Tigress standing near the peach tree, watching him with the slightest hint of concern in her eyes.

"Hey Tigress." Po said, trying to hide his thoughts from her, though ultimately failing

"Are you alright Po?" Tigress asked, stepping towards the tree

"Me? Yeah, I'm fine." Po said, trying to wave away Tigress' concerns

When she didn't look particularly convinced, Po sighed in defeat and moved over, making space for Tigress to sit next to him underneath the tree. She looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to talk.

"I've been thinking a lot lately about what happened in Gongmen city." Po said

"What do you mean?"

"Finding out about my parents, about what Shen did. It's…I just don't know how to deal with that." Po admitted

"You don't have to do it alone Po." Tigress said, putting her paw on his arm comfortingly

"I know. But it's hard finding out you're the last of your kind." Po said, staring at the ground

Tigress didn't have a response to that, so instead she stood for a few moments, settling back on the ground with a peach in either paw. She held one out to Po, who took it wordlessly and began eating as they watched the sun setting over the Valley of Peace, both lost in thought but glad to share each other's company.

_**Later That Night**_

Tigress sat in her room, awake long after the others had gone to sleep. She wanted to just lie down and close her eyes, she really did, but her thoughts kept drifting back to Po, and everything he'd said earlier.

She wanted to do something to show that they all supported him, but she just didn't know what. Po was still shaken from learning he was the last of his kind, but it wasn't as if Tigress could just make some more pandas appear from thin air.

Make some more pandas. That gave Tigress an idea. A brilliant idea. An idea that she spent the rest of the night developing into a plan.

_**The next day**_

It was the last day before the warriors of the Jade Palace went back to their usual training routine. So, they'd all gone down to the village to spend their last few hours of freedom before they were faced with Shifu and his staff.

Viper and Crane had gone off on their own-Monkey and Mantis were going to have a field day with that-Po was visiting his dad's noodle shop and Tigress had no idea where Monkey and Mantis were. Knowing those two, probably following Crane and Viper.

That left Tigress alone, just like she wanted.

She made her way through the village, being stopped by villagers every few seconds to be congratulated on the victory against Shen. It made her progress difficult, but soon attention was drawn away from her, and Tigress found herself in front of the right shop.

She walked into the small shop, a beauty salon. A place Tigress was, anybody could tell, completely unfamiliar with.

One of the shop workers approached Tigress, stepping timidly towards her.

"Master Tigress?" The worker, a young rabbit said "Can I help you?"

"Yes. I'm looking for some fur dye." Tigress replied, smiling mischievously

_**The Next Evening**_

Tigress slammed the bathhouse door behind her, panting heavily as she slumped against it. She heard the others running to the door only a few seconds behind her. After training it was always a mad dash to be the first to the bathhouse, and that day Tigress had been determined. It had been a very long day including training and meditation for all the masters, made longer by the fact that Tigress was waiting impatiently for it to end. By the time Shifu let them go it was already getting very late.

After Tigress had bathed she spent a few minutes getting everything ready before walking out and leaving the others to fight over the next bath. She knew nobody would notice what she'd done until they'd stopped fighting, and that wasn't likely to happen anytime soon. She should have used that time to get as far away as possible, but then she wouldn't be able to see anybody's reactions and then what would be the point. She knew everyone would go back to their rooms before Po made dinner, so it wasn't likely they would see each other until Po had finished cooking.

Half an hour later and the last of the warriors had emerged from the bathhouse. It was Po, as usual, and he decided to go back to the bunkhouse quickly before he began cooking to check on Tigress. He noticed she'd been acting off all day, and he wanted to be sure she was alright.

But as he walked back to his room, Po began to notice strange things. There were strange black and white marks on the floor leading to the bunkhouse, and inside the barracks in the hallway. Po almost ignored it, but his curiosity and concern for his friends got the better of him.

He tiptoed to the nearest door, which just so happened to lead into Mantis' room and slowly slid open the thin paper doors. The sight he was met with was so odd, so unexpected, so…_comical_, that Po rubbed his eyes to be sure what he was seeing was real.

As soon as Po realized that no, he wasn't hallucinating, he instantly burst out laughing so violently that he fell backwards, not only tearing through the front wall of Mantis' room but stumbling backwards breaking the door to Monkey's room as well.

The noise of a hysterical panda crashing through two doors woke everybody up, and when the furious five-excluding Tigress, who was watching amusedly from her doorway-saw each other, there was a moment of confusion where the only sound was Po's laughter.

It was, they agreed later, probably the strangest sight to ever be seen within the walls of the Jade Palace. A viper, praying mantis, crane and golden languor all dyed black with white patches, a panda laughing uncontrollably and a hardcore tiger watching it all with a very unhardcore smile on her face, trying to suppress her own laughter.

Then everybody turned on Po. It really did seem like his fault at the time, with the laughing and the fact that they were all died to look like pandas. The fact that Monkey and Mantis had torn walls didn't help either. The four pranked masters began to advance on Po, and it was only at this point that Po stopped laughing and realised that if he didn't do something, his life was going to be very painful very soon.

"Wait, guys, I didn't do this!" Po said, scrambling to his feet and backing away. His protests fell on deaf ears as the four warriors continued to slowly back Po into a corner "Seriously, I had nothing to do with this!" Po protested again, holding his hands up as he backed up. He felt his back hit the wall of the barracks. He gulped, knowing what was about to happen, when Tigress spoke.

"He didn't do it." She said so suddenly and fiercely it startled everyone, including Po. Anybody who didn't know better would have thought there was a slight trace of protectiveness in her voice.

"What?" They all demanded, including Po who was still in shock from almost being destroyed

"It was me." Tigress replied, stepping forward with her arms crossed firmly in front of her chest "Not Po."

In an instant the Monkey, Mantis, Viper and Crane had leapt across the hallway to Tigress, but it was one instant too many. Tigress had already run right past them and out of the barracks, leaving four of the furious five to crash into each other mid-air.

They quickly shook themselves out of a collision related daze and ran out of the barracks, chasing Tigress through the grounds of the Palace. Po, after getting over his initial confusion, ran after them, right past a very confused Master Shifu who'd come to check after hearing Po crash through the walls a few minutes previously.

Po didn't actually know why he was chasing the others, except maybe to stop them from injuring Tigress too much. In hindsight, Tigress could've taken them but Po was tired and hungry and by that point it was getting to be very late.

Po followed as the furious five raced around the Jade Palace, bounced behind them as they ran down the stairs and through the village as the chase continued. They weren't exactly being quiet about it either, and as they ran lights went on and windows opened. Needless to say, everyone who caught a glimpse was very confused as to why the Great Master Tigress was running from the rest of the furious five who were dyed to look like pandas and the Dragon Warrior who was struggling along behind them.

Eventually Po lost sight of the others when he stopped to catch his breath, but just as he was about to turn back to the Jade Palace he was pulled into an alleyway, a hand clamped firmly over his mouth to stop him from shouting. He struggled for a few moments before a voice whispered beside his ear.

"Po, it's me." Tigress hissed quietly, releasing Po when he stopped resisting

"Tigress? How did you-"

"I ran into this sidestreet after turning a corner. Did the others see me?"

"No, I don't think so. I lost sight of them." Po admitted

"Good. I don't feel like taking them all on at once right now." Tigress said, smiling slightly

"Why did you do that?" Po asked, beginning to regain his breath from all the running

"I wanted to cheer you up. After Gongmen City, you seemed a little..." Tigress replied, trailing off

"Thanks Tigress." Po said sincerely "It means a lot."

Without warning Po wrapped his arms around Tigress, and after a second she returned the gesture. The two stayed in each other's embrace for a few more moments before pulling apart, both smiling at the other.

"Should we go back?" Po asked

Tigress didn't get a chance to reply as her stomach growled, demanding she eat the dinner she'd missed. Both the panda and tiger began to laugh, trying to remain quiet until a similar sound came from Po, and then they simply couldn't contain it any longer.

"Let's go, I'm starving." Tigress said once they'd calmed down

"What about the others?" Po asked, worried

"By the time they wash off we'll have finished eating and be asleep. They can take it out on me during training tomorrow." Tigress said

"Alright." Po agreed

The two began walking back to the palace quickly, trying to avoid the four warriors who were probably still looking for Tigress. And when Po took Tigress' hand during the walk, she didn't complain.

**Woah, that turned out longer than I expected. And I threw a little TiPo action in at the end there for you. Next chapter is *drumroll* 63. Viper and Tigress-Pretended to be pregnant to see Shifu's reaction : Sent on an unimportant mission to the other side of China.**


	4. Number 63-Pregnant on a Dare

**To the guest that requested it, this chapter's all for you!**

**One thing guys: I changed it slightly so it was a dare and Monkey gets included in the punishment.**

**63. Viper and Tigress-Pretended to be pregnant to see Shifu's reaction : Sent on an unimportant mission to the other side of China.**

"You ready?" Viper asked

"As I'll ever be." Tigress replied

The two were standing at the base of Peach Tree Hill, at the top of which sat the Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom where Master Shifu often meditated. Today was one of those days, as each of the Jade Palace students had been given the day off to meditate. Having each completed-or in Po's case, sort of completed-their meditation, they'd decided to play truth or dare. And on a dare from Mantis, Viper and Tigress had to tell Master Shifu they were pregnant.

Neither of them really wanted to do it, but if it was a choice between Shifu's rage and looking like cowards, they'd choose Shifu's rage. At least facing that wasn't a first, and they wouldn't be alone.

Monkey was hiding nearby to make sure they completed the dare, as were the other males of the Jade Palace, which meant there was no backing out.

The two began to slowly make their way to where Shifu was meditating, really not wanting to go through with it but both unwilling to back. Tigress because of her pride and Viper because of her loyalty to Tigress.

It occurred to Tigress that the slow pace might make their story more believable, but it was only a fleeting thought as they reached the peach tree.

The only sign that Shifu knew they were there was a slight twitch in his ears, but it was enough for the two women to be certain he was aware of their presence.

"Master?" Tigress said slowly

The uncertainty in her voice concerned Shifu, it was rare that his adoptive daughter was ever unsure of her actions and words. Shifu deduced instantly that something was wrong, and quickly grabbed his Master's staff, rising from the lotus position he'd been meditating in to his feet.

"What is it? Is something wrong?" Shifu said, a little too quickly to be casual

Viper and Tigress exchanged one final glance and a slight nod to each other, worrying their Master even more, before turning and speaking in unison.

"We're pregnant."

Shifu's eyes widened to comical proportions as he searched the faces of the girls he considered his daughters, looking for a sign that what they were saying was untrue. But the fear on their faces made Shifu truly believe what they were saying, and it was with a great deal of effort that he didn't black out there and then.

He clutched Oogway's staff for support, trying not to sink to his knees as Viper and Tigress looked at him with genuine fear in their eyes, though unbeknownst to him it was fear of the punishment they would receive when their Master found out they were lying.

Suddenly, laughter could be heard from a nearby bush. The three standing on the hill turned and saw monkey, whose laughter had proven stronger than his will, struggling to stop as he was caught in Shifu's glare.

"Everybody else join him." Shifu commanded, and Po, Mantis and Crane trudged reluctantly from the bushes they'd been hiding in

Everybody watched, holding their breath as Shifu's eye began to twitch in the way that meant they were in serious trouble. He forced himself to be calm, closing his eyes and breathing deeply before he spoke again.

"I take it you were dared to do this?" He said to Viper and Tigress, who nodded silently "I won't ask who dared you." Shifu said, staring pointedly at Monkey

They waited for Shifu to dish out punishments, and it came as a great shock when this wasn't the next thing he said.

"Students you're dismissed."

_**The Next Morning**_

The Furious Five and Dragon Warrior stood outside their bedroom doors as the morning gong, even Po had gone to the effort of waking up early. They didn't want to make Shifu madder than he probably always was.

"Good morning students." Shifu said as he stepped through the doors, and they couldn't help but notice he seemed a little too happy

"Good morning Master." They all said together

"I have received word of a mission that will need immediate attention. Monkey, Tigress and Viper, you will be going to a village in a far off province to assist in the retrieval of some supplies that have fallen into a ravine in a recent storm." Shifu said, smiling cruelly

"Yes Master." Said the three students in question, bowing

Everyone else went to train, leaving Monkey, Viper and Tigress to pack their things. Monkey knew he was being glared at through the walls, and he didn't dare imagine what Viper and Tigress were going to put him through while they were on the mission.

"Are you ready?" Tigress asked coldly, standing at his door with a pack that contained both her and Viper's things

"Yes." Monkey said, pulling his own pack on

After the got back three weeks later, Monkey refused to play truth or dare for months, and he never would say why. It might have had something to do with the sadistically amused smiles Tigress and Viper wore whenever he was asked to join their games, but nobody ever did find out.

**Ok, so three chapters (of two different stories) out in one night? I'm on a roll. Next one won't be until tomorrow most likely, but it's going to be two in one-25. Monkey and Po-Trapped Mantis in the trunk of an ironwood tree after he stole both of their secret stashes of food : Rescued Mantis two days later when they realised he was still trapped and 26. Monkey and Po-'Borrowed' Shifu's staff to aid the rescue of Mantis after he got himself even more stuck : Wacked over the head with said staff several times and made to punch the ironwood trees every day for a week.**

**Remember guys, reviews are awesome!**


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